Thursday, November 10, 2005

When your brain gives out. . .

Working round the clock right now. My brain is complete mush and not the good wow-what-a-party kind of mush either. Was just about at the breaking point yesterday, staring over the edge into that mental abyss where your head says 'That's enough. You need a break so I'm shutting down.' You know, where you drive to school to pick up the kids and halfway home you start thinking did I run that stop sign earlier? Did I close the garage door when I left? Crap, did I pick up the right kids? Twenty minutes of your life is gone, not missing, no, it was never even there. Automatic motor reflexes got you through the journey while your frontal lobes lay face down in a Reynosa drainage ditch.

Following the cranial whiplash there is that awkwardly comforting realization that those are the fruit of your loins in the backseat. Reality slaps you with the sinking feeling that something is off kilter and it's best you take a long nap. Then what pray tell do I hear? What is the first coherent noise to filter through? Chris Smither. . .
"The why we'll never know, we passed that long ago. Is and was is all we're ever gonna be."
I can't be sure, but I believe fluid is building up on my spinal cord.


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